FARTS MALICIOUSLY

SCHIAVO
* "It should be obvious that Bush was cynically using the Schiavo tragedy to draw attention away from his massive intelligence failures with regard to alleged Iraqi weapons of mass destruction. Just as the Right employed the deaths of innocent Americans on 9/11 as a cover to pursue an unrelated war in Iraq, so Bush is using the death of an innocent woman to direct attention away from a supremely embarrassing report on US intelligence. Back when people used to put gold fillings in their teeth, it gave burglars an incentive occasionally to rob graves. This news conference was a sort of Public Relations grave robbery, and among the blackest moments in the history of the presidency... Powerful non-fundamentalist men and uppity Third World countries that won't do as they are told are ultimately no different from feminist women seeking an abortion." LINK
juancole gets totally profound - go read.

* "Tom DeLay (R-Tex.), under fire from Democrats for what they consider threatening remarks about federal judges, plans to ask the Judiciary Committee to undertake a broad review of the courts' handing of the Terri Schiavo case". LINK

* yesterday i pointed to the soutpark schiavo video - turns out that was only 11 mins of the show. pretty cool anyway. i wish they had said "they've unkilled kenny! You bastards!"

* "Cheney said he backed efforts to help save Terri Schiavo’s life, but strongly disagreed with House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-Texas), who wants retribution against judges who blocked restoration of her feeding tube.
“I don’t think that’s appropriate . . . There’s a reason why judges get lifetime appointments.”" LINK bitchslap.

* notblogger andrewsullivan wakes up after the schiavo orgy with a headache. 'hang on, if she had a living will, wouldnt it still be murder?' d'oh. LINK

* "The coverage of the Schiavo tragedy is just the latest example of how conservatives have established a permanent media infrastructure that lets them push a button to start a public furor over virtually any issue of their choosing." LINK
the interesting thing is how many other schiavos the scaife machine has simmering away on the backburner. theyve supported this one for years.

* " Terri was just 110 pounds when she collapsed, down from more than 200 in her high school years." LINK
bulimia. yummmmmmmmmmmm. thats why we got those bikini shots.

* " Rep. Steve King (R-IA): Congress created all of the courts; all the federal courts, Congress grants them jurisdiction. So whatever Congress gives, they can take away. If we wanted to abolish the 9th Circuit, for example, we could do that. Now I’m not going to say I think that’s the prudent thing to do. We could also cut the budget. We could prohibit the Justice Department from enforcing the orders of the court... they are counterproductive to this country and if we’re going to preserve our Constitution, we must get them in line." LINK
jfc. these people are equally and separately very fucking scary.

* in other news, speaking of the functionally impaired, the following is a list of descriptors for sex scenes used by some folk who subtitle for tv et al
"Below is a compilation of sex sound effects (or non-verbal utterances) to use when you’re looking to go the extra mile and give the viewer a profound reading experience.
GROANS LUSTFULLY
GROWLS PLAYFULLY
MOANS EROTICALLY
CHUCKLES SEDUCTIVELY
GASPS ORGASMICALLY
BREATHES EXHAUSTEDLY
PANTS EXCITEDLY
MURMURS TEASINGLY
GROANS STRENUOUSLY
SQUEALS CLIMACTICALLY
SIGHS SHALLOWLY
BED CREAKS RHYTHMICALLY
GASPS HESITANTLY
GRUNTS AGGRESSIVELY
SCREECHES FALSELY
SNICKERS SADISTICALLY
GASPS PAINFULLY
*FARTS ACCIDENTALLY
*FARTS MALICIOUSLY
*Not to be used unless you are CERTAIN that is what is taking place!"